Coffee and Mindfulness

Since I have added mindful work practice very intentionally to my meager sitting practice, I observe that caffeine is a hindrance. I notice I become harried due to the stimulant, especially when low blood sugar hits at the end of an effective dose.

Multitasking, the opposite of mindful work, is almost irresistible when under the influence of the disinhibiting caffeine. Multitasking stimulates adrenaline, a step up from caffeine as a stress-maker. The high from both multitasking and adrenaline are life-long addictions for me. Great fun while they last, but mindfulness killers which lead to reactivity and irritability. So eventually it is not just me that pays for my lovely high, but those around me, too. Do I ask them if they'd like to pay for my addiction?

I wonder what my life would have been like if I would have been motivated to do something about this earlier. Wondering about the past. Oh....not very zen.